When I was 13, my father was killed in an automobile accident. This single one event caused a downward spiral of events than would shape my life into the catastrophic state it is in now. I often wondered if he had lived and I had a positive male role model would I have made better choices in life. I was essentially raised by pro wrestlers, became a wrestler and promoter myself. Living in a world like that, where reality is what you make it, and you suffer no consequences for your actions, I had a warped sense of what was real and was not. I grew up lying, scamming, and breaking the law. Today I am 35 and my life is in shambles. If I could only go back to the pivotal moment …

Migrated to the US at 3 yrs old. Raised  with wise guys but kept my Latino roots. Joined the USMC at 17 Travel the world. I love Latin music and it became part of my survival. I have been fortunate to have met and performed with legendary musician. Dealt with drug abuse and betrayal. Honored my mother and love my children but the system took my life away due to my divorce. Now I begin life again and many doors open on my way to a Grammy! I thank God Everyday and Believe!

Connie Noll worked as a conference coordinator in Collins Hall at the U.S. Army War College in Carlisle, PA. At 4:00 PM July 15, 1994, Connie turned off her computer, wished her office mates a great weekend, and left Collins Hall. She made the right-hand turn into the driveway at 3095 Ritner Highway and hit the garage door opener. As the garage door slowly rose, she noticed that her husband’s Cherokee was parked to the side of its normal spot. Then she saw him. “Oh my God, Jack! What have you done?” she cried out. The scene was macabre, like something out of a horror movie. As the garage door finished opening, Connie saw Jack hanging from a rope tied to a ceiling joist.

On Monday, July 25, I had a meeting with Connie Noll. This was the first time that I had met her, and I had no idea what she had just been through. We discussed the details of a conference that I was hosting in September. I left Collins Hall en route to the hospital in Harrisburg. My wife Barbara was in the hospital fighting for her life after an eighteen-month battle with breast cancer. Two days later, her breathing and her heart stopped. The doctors were able to revive her, but the prognosis was not good. She remained in a coma for twenty-one days before she finally passed away. The date was August 16, 1994, a month and one day after the death of Jack Noll.

On September 14, I went to Collins Hall to start greeting guests that were coming to the conference. I saw Connie Noll and we exchanged greetings. During our discussion she said that a co-worker told her about the loss of my wife and she offered her condolences. I thanked her and we talked briefly. I still had no idea of her personal situation. Later that day one of the War College professors asked me if I knew that Connie had just lost her husband. I felt stunned and embarrassed. I got up from my chair and went looking for Connie. When I found her I told her I had just learned about her husband, and I was terribly sorry I hadn’t returned her condolences. Connie said, “That’s okay, you wouldn’t have any reason to know.” It did not make me feel any less of a heel, but at least I had told her how I felt. I saw Connie again late in the afternoon of the second day of the conference, just before one of the breaks. We were alone in the break area. We exchanged greetings and Connie suggested maybe we ought to get together to talk. I agreed that sharing our pain and suffering was probably a good idea.

I moved to Fort Leavenworth one week later. Connie and I maintained our long distance friendship that soon developed into a mutual love. We married on September 30th 1995 and will celebrate fifteen wonderful years together in 2010.

In September 2007 my father passed away at age 45- healthy ,young, a freak incident the doctor said. I drove home to plan the funeral. Mom in bad shape-hospitalization-very very bad. I was driving back to my home for work 3 days later, when just as I was passing exit 100 a drunk driver was pulling a tractor trailer, the wrong way down an off ramp on the interstate. He hit me head on before I even knew what had happened. Then everything was black. I woke to fire, screaming, smoke and sirens. I was in a car with my pet. The car was totalled, and on fire- I had major injuries but was alive- pet was fine. Man thought he had killed me because I was not moving after accident- he fled the scene, people chased him down- and he later shot himself. I had to file a law suit to get my surgeries for my injuries. And then another because my grandparents and fathers family decided they wanted my inheritance from my family…and the family based business-we are now estranged and in a court battle. So then I get a rental car to drive back to my home for surgeries, the rental car they gave me for some reason had a nail in the tire and I almost had a blow out on the interstate-( a trucker saved me thankfully)- but it still had a flat in the middle of no -where – so I was stranded….I finally go back to my home and get in a 3 month long battle with the insurance company over paying for my surgeries,it is intense. I cannot breathe properly without the surgeries. I’m in physical therapy. Bones are re-broken. When I finally do get them I have a severe reaction to the codeine (turns out I am allergic) and I become very-very ill and have an allergic reaction- back in the hospital. It takes a few years to recover from the surgeries, one law suit is done, after a year, I still don’t have a car, the other law suit for my fathers estate is still going on after over 2 years. My nerves are finally back. This is a true story.

On February 19, 2002 my father called me to discuss my mother’s declining health. He told me that the nurses had informed him that she would pass away in the next few months. I felt so bad about this, and all the pain she had been put through because of Alzheimer’s and breast cancer, I started praying at 9:30pm that she be freed and allowed to go home.

Later on that evening, around 3 in the morning, the telephone started ringing. I was in a deep sleep in which I was dreaming that I was sitting in a red convertible next to my mother who was driving. She had long flowing hair, and was smiling as she drove. We kept driving to try and find the right place she had to go to die.

I finally heard the telephone and awoke to answer it. It was my father who called to say my mother was dying and that I needed to come from Washington DC to Minnesota as soon as possible.

I made my travel arrangements and drove to work to take care of a few things on the way to the airport. During that time, the care facility called me to see what time I would be arriving and to let me know, not much time was left. I asked them to put the telephone to my mother’s head so she could hear. Once that was done, I told her that I was her daughter, and that I was coming to see her and I asked her to wait.

While on the airplane, I went to the flight attendant to ask if my seat could be moved closer to the door because of the situation. After she checked with the captain, I was moved by the door, and the airplane crew had other folks wait until I got off the plane. For some reason, the plane also ended up at the closest gate to the rental cars.

The rental facility got me through their process in under 10 minutes which allowed me to drive quickly to the care facility. When I arrived, I did not know what I would find, my mother still alive, or that she had passed away.

As I approached her room, the nursing staff saw me and escorted me down. They told me for some reason the dying process stopped, that they had never seen anything like it, and that for a time, she was holding her own. My mother had waited for me before passing away.

I am still struck to this day with the fact that my mother heard me, and waited for me. What a great gift.