Faith in “The Word” has always been a given for me. From being able to stay with my Granny and Papa during the summers to marring at fifteen and converting to my religion and its teachings.
Being a nurse was always my goal in life and practicing for many years was extremely satisfying. I loved each and every one of my patients. However, being as careful as possible, is not always enough. While working the morning shift, I was helping a gentleman to the restroom. Unaware of a leaking toilet and already in mid stride, my thoughts were, ” Lord, please help me!” It happened so fast, I helped my patient in a chair and I hit the floor. There I was in the middle of the floor, soaking wet, a sharp pain pulsating through my back and with an ” End Stage Downs” patient.
My shift supervisor sent me home. Driving was miserable, I had to go to the emergency room for x-rays. The nursing was over with.
I spent years in pain, physical therapies, loosing feeling from my mid section down, but the most horrible
part was,,,,asking “God” why.
Desperation and a deep depression came flooding in on me. One surgery would come and then another. Then my neurosurgeon told me he could not do any thing further and recommended an experiental procedure, I jumped on the chance.
Needless to say, during the years and multiple surgeries, I thought my strong (or stubborn) will to survive, my, “I’ll do it alone,” would see me through. It was while I lay on the operating table feeling them cut me open, probe my back and saying “just a few more minutes, try to be very, very still that I knew, I can not do this
by myself.
“Oh, God, Lord, My Holy Savior, please give me strength. I know I have doubted you, please forgive me.”
Those thoughts and prayers guided me and I have known more, each day that we are foolish to ever think, “we can do it alone.” Our God and Savior is out there, have faith and seek him.
